| (no subject) |
[Jun. 22nd, 2006|02:46 am] |
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I'll fight like hell to hide that I've given up. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 18th, 2006|02:34 am] |
I've accomplished everything I set out to do five months ago.
I drew, what I think, the coolest thing I have every drawn the other day.
I got offers for two jobs. One would be designing brochures and pamphlets for a pool/spa company in San Marcos. The other would be doing title searches for houses and whatnot for a company in Mission Valley.
Me and Ally are going to see Animal Collective in March, and then going on a road trip up the coast. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 5th, 2006|07:31 pm] |
m.
I've been sleeping less than ever.
I've been skipping more meals than ever.
I've been listening to music louder than ever.
I've been smoking more cigarettes than ever before.
Events are colliding, and melting together. I've been loosing long periods of time.
I find myself loosing entire days. I can't remember anything.
an entire week passed. I didn't even realize, shit. I thought it was Sunday.
1. Don't trust anyone.
2. Stop thinking in absolutes.
3. Stop reducing everything to lists and talking points.
Everything I do follows a formula.
I watched the sun come up yesterday. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 16th, 2005|12:33 am] |
cliffs:
1. I quit my job
2. I'm not going to Europe
3. I'm just drifting ... here in the pool
4. ...
5. Profit?
Every post I make is the same shit:
boo hoo, I'm so fucking confused, life is hard, boo hoo.
I'm sick of that shit.
but that's all I have to say, because I'm boring, and I am fucking confused, and life is hard.
We're all fucked, and I'll tell you why:
Global Dimming + Global Warming.
Let me start by explaining clouds, for those (ha, no one will read this) of you that don't know how clouds are formed.
Water condenses on particles (usually pollen, and other naturally occurring particles) and creates drops of water, which when become heavy enough, drop to the ground as rain.
Now, with how much shit we have pumped into the air, there are more particles, but there isn't more water. So, what is happening, is that there are more smaller drops of water in the sky. Which, these drops of water act like mirrors, and are shinning light back into space.
So, why is the planet not cooling down?
Because of Global Warming, and the Greenhouse Effect, which is caused by greenhouse gases trapping heat in the atmosphere.
So, what we get is a combined effect of cooling and warming. In other words, we have fucked the Earth in two ways:
One that cools us down, and one that warms us up.
If we stop polluting the temperature raises, and we have global flooding within 10 years.
If we stop producing greenhouse gases the temperature falls, and we suffocate because all our trees die, and we eventually freeze.
dammit.
Why does no one care about anything?
We have fucked everything, and no one is doing anything about it, myself included.
but hey, at least I didn't vote for Bush, right?
and I'm against the war, right?
and I'm all for equal rights, right?
All of this would not be a problem if Kerry were President.
ugh. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 17th, 2005|01:26 am] |
I'm a sarcastic piece of shit.
nah nah nah nah.
I'm confused about everything, right now.
angst. angst. angst.
I want to move away, with all of my friends, and live on a farm.
I want to pick apples from trees, and pull carrots from the ground.
I want to carve a chair out of a piece of wood.
I want to go fishing, and feel guilty if I catch anything, so cut that out, I don't want to go fishing.
I've forgotten what I've been fighting for. What the fuck am I doing?
I sell fucking home decor to housewives going through their mid-life crisis, that feel the need to redecorate their entire house, room-by-room, so that they feel that their life had some meaning.
I feel like I have no friends. I feel like the friends I do have don't fucking care about our friendship.
I don't know what I want to do with my life.
I wrote a list of everything that I'm confused about, but lost it, and am confused as to where it went.
NOW:
Let us, together, make a list, of everything that I need to do, in order that they need to be done.
1. Call the DMV about my ID card I bought like 5 months ago and never recieved.
2. Take my driving test, and get my license.
3. Quit my job.
4. Go to the sperm bank and jerk-off for money.
5. ---
ok. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 6th, 2005|06:48 pm] |
I haven't found the time, or inspiration to do anything, lately.
It is not very fun.
but, the ends should justify the means.
selling my body, soul and time, now, so that I can be be free for a couple of months, later.
I can't say if it's worth it, or not. Because I don't know what its like "over-there", and will not know until I return.
But, what I can say, is that Work kills the human soul. Work is why no one thinks anymore.
This is what happens:
You go to school, and try your hardest (or be good at a sport) and then you get into college.
You party and work your way through college, and eventually get a degree in something you have a slight interest in.
You use said degree to get a job somewhere.
You either A) meet someone in college, or B) go around to bars looking for someone, and eventually marry them.
You see friends on occasion, but most of you time is consumed by work, and what little time you do have, you spend with your partner, who recently, has lost sexual interest in you.
You have kids, and you watch them do the exact same things that you did.
You die.
Fuck that noise, those aren't my goals.
However, on a happy note, my beard and hair are growing out. I'm going to get a jedi-lock, and wrap thread around it, and put beads in my beard.
Also, I finally dumped Windows, and switched to Linux. |
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| blargh |
[Jul. 20th, 2005|06:18 pm] |
photoshop with mouse,
still experimenting with style. |
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ihatethedekoys's journal
